沉思？冥想？

Yup, recently that had been a lot of thoughts running through my mind. I think i really need sometimes to digest and decide which way to go on further... Sigh......

It had been around half year since we apart; i kept telling myself that i have to forget bout you, and i always thought that i really had forget bout you; but... until recently, i started to wonder, do i really forgot everything already? I wonder......

On the other hand, i also wonder, am i really missing you so much? I mean miss "YOU" this person? Or i was just simply miss the "WE" time? Is it i still cannot accept the fact that you had leave and won't come back forever? Confused! A matter of fact, i really know and understand the current situation, that we are no longer together; now we are just simply two separate "ME". I really understand that! But emotional side, i don't know why, on and off, i still miss our happy moments. The feeling of my life is missing something grows stronger especially when i am in K-Box. I don't know why. Maybe because of those touching love songs? Or maybe because you used to drag me to K-Box with you? I don't know. But i think... and i know i must move on already! So i think i may post up an article to express myself out (which i had depress for so long), and concluded, ended everything here. Childish huh!?

Still remember, we started on 10th of January 2008, and ended somewhere middle of May (sorry, i have no courage to remember the exact date we leave each other). Our relationship didn't last long, but it had changed me a lot. I learned a lot from you... how to be a better person, particularly a better lover. Along the period we together, i really experienced the most wonderful time in my life. Thank you!
And sorry that i no longer able be your guardian angel!

After you walked out from my life, it's like the worst thing ever happen in my life. Many things happened... bad things... Your leaving = My bad luck? I wonder. Anyway, finally, i still able to get through it. And now i stand up once again, to prepare to welcome my unknown future ^^
Glad that you accepted my friend request in facebook. Looking at your photo, now i realized that the LOVE feeling is gone. Now i can face you open-heartedly already. With love gone, it replace with a much more stable relationship, i don't know what / how you thinking about me; but for me, you are my friend of life, i do care bout you as much as i do last time ^^ But i won't do everything for you blindly already.

Now, here, i quote a song from Ah Mei, which may represent my feeling accurately... A feeling fron single to couple, and then back to single... Yes, love make people grow. So do i. I changed a lot since met you, and now i hope i am a better guy than last time.

Here......

Ah Mei - 我為什麼那麼愛你

看日落　往大海裡沉沒　一動不動　到煙頭燙了你的手
不要說　什麼都別刺破　就算結束　努力溫暖到最後

我想靜靜離開　你卻從背後　拉住我的手
你並沒有用力　怎麼我那麼痛

我多想說沒有關係　我還愛你　卻擠不出一絲力氣
是我錯過什麼記憶　才從幸福跳到這裡

最怕自己從今以後　什麼都不相信
當初多勇敢愛了你　多勇敢才能原諒你

我為什麼　那麼愛你　愛到什麼都說可以
發誓絕不做的事情　現在做的不想放棄

愛情到底讓人脆弱　還是讓人堅定
我用盡最後的力氣　從頭到尾都沒有哭泣

愛曾是　我盲目的理由　你犯的錯　除了我別人都看透
暮色中　心特別的寂寞　眼眶的淚　該為你還是為我流

我想靜靜離開　你卻從背後　拉住我的手
你並沒有用力　怎麼我那麼痛

我多想說沒有關係　我還愛你　卻擠不出一絲力氣
是我錯過什麼記憶　才從幸福跳到這裡

最怕自己從今以後　什麼都不相信
當初多勇敢愛了你　多勇敢才能原諒你

我為什麼　那麼愛你　愛到什麼都說可以
發誓絕不做的事情　現在做的不想放棄

愛情到底讓人脆弱　還是讓人堅定
我用盡最後的力氣　從頭到尾都沒有哭泣

Yes, as in this song's lyrics,
Love is blind or i should say people who fall in love is blind, they will do anything for their lover blindly.
And yet, i still hope i can be blind once again ^^