Recently a lot of things happened... good or bad... on me or on my friends or even on strangers that i just happened to hear the story only... in short... many various kind of stuff happen recently...
Well... which all these makes me think a lot... especially those stuff that happened on myself or my close one trigger me a lot... make me think... further and deeper... ......
Yeah... after all these years of struggling and fighting... i thought i can live a normal simple life... but in fact... i cannot... things will just happen... not only on me... but everyone else too... maybe this is life... sigh... ......
And i realize that... i had make a huge mistake... the worst decision that i had ever made... after all those tiring fighting / so called "war" in college time... i really feel so tired on it... and i decided that when i start to work... i must treat everyone nice regardless what a person is that... i thought as long as i treat people nice... they will treat me the same way... or maybe they won't but i think they also won't do something bad to harm me as i am no harm to them... but i am all wrong... totally wrong... this is realistic... a cruel world... they may want or dont want to harm or hurt others... but due to many reasons... a person intention doesn't take in count anymore... to survive... a person may need to / must hurt someone in order to protect themselves... this is nobody's wrong... but this is the trend of this world... this real and cruel world... ......
So... my naive thinking... had put me through a lot of bad experiences... sigh... i don't know this is a good sign or not... but still... yes... hurt but grow up a lot... ha... am i too old to be grow up already? but in fact... i learn a lot... sigh... learn through sad yet hurt situation... ......
Sigh... i don't want to hurt anyone... but i think... in order to protect myself... i need / must do whatever i can as long as myself don't get hurt... right? am i right? sigh... i think so...
Defense system...
...
......
...
ON!??
Sigh... or anyone can teach me a moderate way??????
@.@
Taiwan Day 6
11 years ago
Hi, Terry!
ReplyDeleteI'm just a stranger to you... Came across your blog and saw this particular entry of yours. I had EXACTLY the same experience as you! I have ALWAYS thought that if I treat people nicely, they would do the same to me. But when I worked over the summer holidays in some bank, I was actually FORCED to "eat dead cats" (sik sei mao in cantonese) when it wasn't even my fault!!! To think that I actually treated that particular ex-colleague of mine really nice before he did that to me, I really feel like PUKING BLOOD AND ELECTRICITY ALTOGETHER!!! Despite all these, I still have this feeling that my boss thought that I wasn't at fault and she was just blaming it on me because she doesn't want to hurt that x-colleague's feelings since he's really senior and all that...
Still, I don't think that to defend oneself, one must hurt another first before the latter did something to hurt the former... I mean... "the sky has eyes"... Evil people are BOUND to have retribution sooner or later to the things they have done...